Ser Barristan Selmy is plotting with Skahaz mo Kandaq the shavepate to remove Hizdahr from power, on the grounds that he is probably going to kill the dragons and Dany won't like that. All that business with the Yunkai'i throwing the head of a hostage at the foot of King Hizdahr was, according to the shavepate, all pre-arranged between Hizdahr and the Yunkai'i to give Hizdahr reason to kill the dragons as demanded by the Yunkai'i, who are rightly afraid of them.
In other words, Hizdahr has been working for the Yunkai'i all along. Evidence against him includes his urging Dany to eat the locusts which turned out to be poisined.
Selmy gains access to Hizdahr's quarters in the middle of the night and challenges him on the locusts. He says it was the Dornishman who did it, but we know it was not (or at least, when we have been inside Quentyn's head he hasn't thought about it). He also challenges him on being in charge of the Sons of the Harpy, the terrorist group who were causing Dany all the trouble that caused her to marry Hizdahr in the first place.
Selmy kills Hizdahr's guard, then arrests him. Just then a boy turns up to announce the dragons have escaped. Uh oh!
We also get treated to some reminiscing. Selmy lost a tourney against Prince Rhaegar and so Rhaegar got to choose Lyanna Stark as the "queen of love and beauty". This is presumably how he started wooing her or whatever. Was he married to Elia at the time? Anyway, Selmy thinks if that hadn't happened, then not only might Robert Baratheon not have been annoyed causing him to usurp Mad King Aerys, but since he would have chosen Ashara had he won, she might not have had an affair with Ned Stark and thrown herself off a tower. This Ashara business has been mentioned before. Could she be Jon Snow's mother? Or is it, as Davos was told, some fisherman's daughter? Which tower did Ashara jump from?
Oh here it is, in Storm of Swords Arya is travelling with Edric "Ned" Dayne, the lord of Starfall, nephew of Lady Ashara. "She threw herself into the sea from atop the Palestone Sword." Because "her heart was broken". Because, "aunt Allyria says Lady Ashara and your father fell in love at Harrenhal". Or was it simply that, as in this chapter, "Ashara's daughter had been stillborn". Was the daughter also Ned's bastard? How many women did honourable Ned Stark have? According to Edric Dayne, Jon's mother is Wylla, who was Edric's wet nurse who had served the Daynes for years. Was her father a fisherman, or was she another notch on Ned's bedpost? Could there be other Stark bastards about?
Sunday, 22 September 2019
Saturday, 21 September 2019
ADwD 66: Tyrion 1002
Tyrion promises Brown Ben Plumm of the free company The Second Sons lots of gold in return for the right to join up and, presumably, have some influence in what they do, though this is not clear. He's given a job helping Inkpots, aka Tybero Istarion, the treasurer, to manage the funds. He had this job in King's Landing and was good at it, I seem to remember. Plumm plans to stick around until Meereen is taken and then head to Westeros.
Penny is annoyed with Tyrion about abandoning the pig and the dog. Escaping slavery is not the end of her problems, either. Maybe one day Tyrion will regain some power, or else find some quiet life in a cottage somewhere, and can give Penny a comfortable life. Because that's how things work out in GRRM stories...
Jorah Mormont is still with them too and will probably make a good sellsword. He notices that the Yunkai'i, who plan to attack Meereen, are unlikely to win if Dany returns with her dragon. Tyrion thinks he can get them to switch sides.
Penny is annoyed with Tyrion about abandoning the pig and the dog. Escaping slavery is not the end of her problems, either. Maybe one day Tyrion will regain some power, or else find some quiet life in a cottage somewhere, and can give Penny a comfortable life. Because that's how things work out in GRRM stories...
Jorah Mormont is still with them too and will probably make a good sellsword. He notices that the Yunkai'i, who plan to attack Meereen, are unlikely to win if Dany returns with her dragon. Tyrion thinks he can get them to switch sides.
ADwD 65: Cersei 987
Well played, GRRM, now you have me feeling sorry for Cersei. She has to do a naked walk of shame through the city to atone for sins she confessed to before standing trial for the ones she didn't. Then again, they include having people tortured and killed, so...
She has to do the walk of shame. She does pretty well at first, resolving to hold her head high since none of this really matters and words yelled by onlookers are wind. After falling over a couple of times (and I'm kind of worried about infections from stepping in poo with a wounded foot) she comes to the realisation that the real cost is that she is revealed as just another woman: the facade of royalty is gone. She realises that doing the walk of shame was a mistake.
Wait, what? She had a choice? Ah yes, in the last Cersei chapter Kevan told her that the High Septon "will not release you until you have atoned for your sins." So I suppose she could have avoided this by staying prisoner, presumably forever. In any case she wanted to get back to her son. Who, by the way, Cersei reflects, could have avoided a lot of trouble by not having Ned beheaded. Because the Starks would still be on their side in Winterfell and the other Baratheons would have been disposed of easily. Though presumably it would not have stopped Joffrey from being poisoned, or Tyrion from shooting Tywin. Whatever Cersei thinks, Littlefinger would still be playing his games.
Some boy is shouting about hot pies. What became of Hot Pie?
She goes a bit mad, sees the old hag who made the prophecy about the other, younger and more beautiful queen who will take everything she holds dear. That would be Margaery I suppose.
Then she gets to the castle. Kevan has hidden Tommen away somewhere, but there is a new 8-foot-tall mute in armor to scoop her up. It's Ser Robert Strong, Qyburn's monster (or just a plain resurrected GREGOR), who will be her champion at the trial.
She has to do the walk of shame. She does pretty well at first, resolving to hold her head high since none of this really matters and words yelled by onlookers are wind. After falling over a couple of times (and I'm kind of worried about infections from stepping in poo with a wounded foot) she comes to the realisation that the real cost is that she is revealed as just another woman: the facade of royalty is gone. She realises that doing the walk of shame was a mistake.
Wait, what? She had a choice? Ah yes, in the last Cersei chapter Kevan told her that the High Septon "will not release you until you have atoned for your sins." So I suppose she could have avoided this by staying prisoner, presumably forever. In any case she wanted to get back to her son. Who, by the way, Cersei reflects, could have avoided a lot of trouble by not having Ned beheaded. Because the Starks would still be on their side in Winterfell and the other Baratheons would have been disposed of easily. Though presumably it would not have stopped Joffrey from being poisoned, or Tyrion from shooting Tywin. Whatever Cersei thinks, Littlefinger would still be playing his games.
Some boy is shouting about hot pies. What became of Hot Pie?
She goes a bit mad, sees the old hag who made the prophecy about the other, younger and more beautiful queen who will take everything she holds dear. That would be Margaery I suppose.
Then she gets to the castle. Kevan has hidden Tommen away somewhere, but there is a new 8-foot-tall mute in armor to scoop her up. It's Ser Robert Strong, Qyburn's monster (or just a plain resurrected GREGOR), who will be her champion at the trial.
ADwD 64: The Ugly Little Girl 972
Arya moves on to the next phase of her training. She, partly magically, partly by literally sticking a dead person's removed face onto her face, gets a new face in the style of that bloke she helped who killed all those people for her back in Harrenhal. Jaqen H'ghar, that was him.
Anyway the rule is that to become an acolyte and get all these cool new powers and skill she's got to give up her identity and become no-one. Her heart's not really in it so I'm hoping she can fool them enough to get the cool new powers and eventually go back to being Arya, have a big Stark family reunion (what's left of them) and get revenge on whoever is still left out of GREGOR (turned into a Frankenstein's monster, presumably), Dunsen (who?), Raff the Sweetling (dead, or still hanging out with the Boltons?), Ser Ilyn Payne (off with Jaime in the Riverlands), Ser Meryn (killed by Pod in battle of the Blackwater trying to kill Tyrion, was it? No that was Mandon Moore. Meryn Trant was the kingsguard who beat up Sansa) and Queen Cersei. This level of dishonesty seems fair enough when dealing with a weird cult that turns children into assassins.
Oh yeah, because Arya has to kill an insurance guy who hasn't been paying out on claims. She does this using the poisoned coin trick seen way back in the prologue of the last book: swaps out coin by pretending to fail at robbing a sea captain. Captain pays coin to insurance guy. Insurance guy bites it to make sure it's real gold. An old trick.
That done, she's now an acolyte and is being sent off to Izembaro, wherever that is, for an apprenticeship.
Anyway the rule is that to become an acolyte and get all these cool new powers and skill she's got to give up her identity and become no-one. Her heart's not really in it so I'm hoping she can fool them enough to get the cool new powers and eventually go back to being Arya, have a big Stark family reunion (what's left of them) and get revenge on whoever is still left out of GREGOR (turned into a Frankenstein's monster, presumably), Dunsen (who?), Raff the Sweetling (dead, or still hanging out with the Boltons?), Ser Ilyn Payne (off with Jaime in the Riverlands), Ser Meryn (killed by Pod in battle of the Blackwater trying to kill Tyrion, was it? No that was Mandon Moore. Meryn Trant was the kingsguard who beat up Sansa) and Queen Cersei. This level of dishonesty seems fair enough when dealing with a weird cult that turns children into assassins.
Oh yeah, because Arya has to kill an insurance guy who hasn't been paying out on claims. She does this using the poisoned coin trick seen way back in the prologue of the last book: swaps out coin by pretending to fail at robbing a sea captain. Captain pays coin to insurance guy. Insurance guy bites it to make sure it's real gold. An old trick.
That done, she's now an acolyte and is being sent off to Izembaro, wherever that is, for an apprenticeship.
Friday, 20 September 2019
ADwD 63: Victarion 962
Victarion captures a bunch of ships, in positions all perfectly predicted by Moqorro the red priest. Victarion is getting pretty enamoured with this rather (and unusually, for a god) well-performing red god. But he hasn't given up on his sea-god yet. So when he captures some maidens being trafficked for the sex industry he sends them off on a boat and burns it so they can burn *and* drown and be sacrificed to both gods at once. Nice. Clever, though.
It's not just the predictions. His arm has gone all bionic, too, so he can pick people up by the neck Darth Vader style. Oh, and we also learn that he has Euron's magic horn. It's not just good for winning kingsmoots, it's can seduce dragons, too! So we can see where this is going, as much as we ever can in these books. Oh but he can't blow the horn himself because the blower dies. He's got to become the master of the horn by doing some sort of blood sacrifice, natch.
It's not just the predictions. His arm has gone all bionic, too, so he can pick people up by the neck Darth Vader style. Oh, and we also learn that he has Euron's magic horn. It's not just good for winning kingsmoots, it's can seduce dragons, too! So we can see where this is going, as much as we ever can in these books. Oh but he can't blow the horn himself because the blower dies. He's got to become the master of the horn by doing some sort of blood sacrifice, natch.
ADwD 62: The Sacrifice 946
Asha Greyjoy presumably thinks of herself as a sacrifice since burning cannibals at the stake hasn't brought the red god to their aid, so she might be next. They're still stuck in the snow. Some bloke called Suggs is particularly keen to burn her, the weirdo.
Her only friend is Ser Justin Massey. Do we know him much? He mainly seems to shout about the futility of it all and get in trouble with Karstark (who turned up and joined Stannis, as predicted, a few days ago), so I'm not sure how much use he would be.
Anyway it's all moot because who should turn up but Tycho Nestoris. Get's about a bit, that banker, I hope he has a company horse. He's brought some of Asha's friends including her boyfriend Tris, who he ransomed from Deepwoode Motte for some reason. He want's to talk to Stannis, presumably about winning the war so he can get paid.
Oh, and he's brought Theon and Jeyne Poole along. Blimey, a family reunion!
Her only friend is Ser Justin Massey. Do we know him much? He mainly seems to shout about the futility of it all and get in trouble with Karstark (who turned up and joined Stannis, as predicted, a few days ago), so I'm not sure how much use he would be.
Anyway it's all moot because who should turn up but Tycho Nestoris. Get's about a bit, that banker, I hope he has a company horse. He's brought some of Asha's friends including her boyfriend Tris, who he ransomed from Deepwoode Motte for some reason. He want's to talk to Stannis, presumably about winning the war so he can get paid.
Oh, and he's brought Theon and Jeyne Poole along. Blimey, a family reunion!
Thursday, 19 September 2019
ADwD 61: The Griffin Reborn 931
Oh so *that's* why Jon Connington called himself Griff? Should I have figured that out before? Anyway it seems like a bit of an obvious secret name, in retrospect.
Anyway, so far so good. Golden Company have landed a fair number of their ships in the right place. Ancestral home retaken nice and easy on account of the surprise and the fact that the owner of the place, Ronnet Connington, is off fighting with Jaime in the Riverlands. Communication lines cut off so no-one knows Jon's arrived yet. Men have been sent to nearby castles like Crow's Nest and Rain House to capture those. Other ships are straggling in. Some turn up at other places like Eastermont, another island. Word will probably get around, which might explain Kevan Lannister's reports of free companies landing a few chapters back, assuming the timelines are a bit muddled up.
Jon Connington worries about his past: how he failed Mad King Aerys by searching for Robert Baratheon instead of burning the town down and killing everyone like Tywin Lannister would have done. Come on Jon, sometimes things just happen. Don't berate yourself too much. Our choices are half chance.
There is a cache of intelligence documents at Griffin's Roost. They're very well informed. They know:
There's a strategic debate about what to do next, the upshot of which is that Connington realises again that Harry Strickland is mostly worried about avoiding blisters, and decides to attack Storm's End. Griff Jr a.k.a the very much not dashed-against-a-wall as a baby Prince Aegon Targaryen turns up and says cool, but he's leading the battle. Oh boy!
Anyway, so far so good. Golden Company have landed a fair number of their ships in the right place. Ancestral home retaken nice and easy on account of the surprise and the fact that the owner of the place, Ronnet Connington, is off fighting with Jaime in the Riverlands. Communication lines cut off so no-one knows Jon's arrived yet. Men have been sent to nearby castles like Crow's Nest and Rain House to capture those. Other ships are straggling in. Some turn up at other places like Eastermont, another island. Word will probably get around, which might explain Kevan Lannister's reports of free companies landing a few chapters back, assuming the timelines are a bit muddled up.
Jon Connington worries about his past: how he failed Mad King Aerys by searching for Robert Baratheon instead of burning the town down and killing everyone like Tywin Lannister would have done. Come on Jon, sometimes things just happen. Don't berate yourself too much. Our choices are half chance.
There is a cache of intelligence documents at Griffin's Roost. They're very well informed. They know:
- Cersei and Margaery are fighting over Tommen
- Mace Tyrell has stopped trying to capture Storm's End (is he back at King's Landing? I forget).
- Lannisters are weakend, depending on treacherous Boltons and Freys in the North and Riverlands.
- "No-one ever seems to mention the vale." What *is* Littlefinger up to right now?
- Doran Martell's son is betrothed to Myrcell, suggesting they are working with Lannisters. But hedging their bets because they have armies hanging around waiting ominously.
There's a strategic debate about what to do next, the upshot of which is that Connington realises again that Harry Strickland is mostly worried about avoiding blisters, and decides to attack Storm's End. Griff Jr a.k.a the very much not dashed-against-a-wall as a baby Prince Aegon Targaryen turns up and says cool, but he's leading the battle. Oh boy!
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